In the discussions regarding the Duggar family over the last couple of weeks, you can see how unthinkingly embittered our country has become. For example, one blogger stated no police report was made because they approached a friend in law enforcement, then later cited the police report as the source for their information.
Many have said the parents are too domineering, causing the kids to be repressed. Then in the next breath we are told the parents made a tactical error allowing the two older daughters to interview. The two daughters in question are legally adults and married, and make their own decisions.
Many have criticized the parents for their actions. They took their son to law enforcement. Criticizing them because they were acquainted with the cop is silly. (In the future will people be forced to find a cop they don’t know to report crimes?)
Others have suggested the parents had blamed the girls instead of the young man, an assertion that is drawn from a combination of the girl’s modest clothing and wild eyed speculation.
Others believe they have a right to pass judgement on the treatment program the parents chose. They assert that doing construction is not the same thing as getting therapy. A little research will show this kind of labor is a part of many such programs, both Christian and non-Christian.
I suspect the real complaint stems from these Christian people responding to their family crisis in a Christian manner. They sought Christian advice, Christian treatment, and afterward practiced grace and forgiveness. They did not feel compelled to choose between their son and their daughters. They did not believe that casting their son permanently out of their house and family was an appropriate response.
In the long run, it strikes me as another example of the erosion of parental rights in our country. Too many people feel the freedom to tell other families how to raise their kids, and some seek to codify their ideas into law.
Passing laws which will take away the freedoms of some of us, will in the long run take away the freedoms of all of us.
The problem for me, and I would have the same objection toward people who avoided doing it for non-religious reasons, is that Josh Duggar was not assessed or treated by a licensed psychologist. All the emphasis and discussion has been about whether or not crimes were committed, instead of trying to get a troubled kid into a normal counseling or diversion program.
This kind of behavior is more common in teenagers than you might think, and treatment by licensed professionals works very well. But it’s too late for that now. His adult personality is set, and the Duggars are stuck defending their avoidance in taking ordinary steps toward getting help for their son. Nobody wins.
You are doing what I commented on. You are saying the parents choices don’t measure up to your expectations. I say our expectations are irrelevant. And assuming the young man is flawed is just a continuation of the problem. We have no right to either, tell a family how to raise their kids nor tell a young man who is functioning normally that we proclaim him flawed.